I'm 30 but get mistaken for 15. Looking young may seem great, but it's made my professional life and job hunt harder.
· Business Insider
Courtesy of Ayman Eckford
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- I'm 30 years old, but I look young and am often mistaken for being half my age.
- This has made it difficult for me to feel like I'm being taken seriously in professional settings.
- Oftentimes, when I apply for jobs or go to the office, I try to make myself look older.
"Have you just started studying?" a tall, smiling man in a suit asked me.
Although I was in a university building, I wasn't there as a student. I was struggling to find a conference room for a work-related meeting — one that, I soon realized, he was also attending. Of course he was.
"Oh, you just look so much younger," he said after he realized we were colleagues. Maybe it was a compliment, but it didn't feel like one to me.
I have countless examples of people perceiving me as half my age, from movie-theater cashiers trying to sell me children's tickets to police officers on the street asking me where my parents are.
There have been several times when I arrived at a youth support group for my job, but the receptionist assumed I was one of the teen clients. It doesn't exactly inspire confidence.
I'm 30, but between my youthful features and my 5-foot-1 height, I am often told I look like a teenager. Many people consider looking young a dream, and it's even a goal for skincare aficionados.
In reality, though, I believe it's made parts of my life — especially my professional life — considerably more difficult.
I've found it's tough to be taken seriously when you look half your age
I don't enjoy regularly being mistaken for a 15-year-old.Courtesy of Ayman Eckford
I have several years of experience providing peer support for individuals with autism and ADHD; helping develop mental-health programs; and leading projects addressing issues faced by refugees, the LGBTQ+ community, and people with disabilities in several countries.
And yet, because of how I look, I still struggle with confidence and worry about being taken seriously at work.
Often, before I've even had the chance to properly introduce myself when interviewing for a job or meeting new people, I'm concerned my appearance has already shaped how I'm perceived.
Looking like a teen feels like an even bigger obstacle when I'm applying for higher-level and leadership roles, especially because most of the work I do involves peer support or management.
A manager is expected to be wise and knowledgeable — qualities not usually associated with youth. And in my field, a peer supporter is someone who has enough lived experience and training to help others navigate situations they have experienced firsthand.
But would a 70-year-old really take advice from someone who looks like their grandson? I don't know, but I do know that appearance and age aren't the same thing as experience.
I try to look older to be taken more seriously, but I wish I didn't have to
I'm worried about how looking like a teen has made it more difficult for me to get certain jobs.Courtesy of Ayman Eckford
Over time, I've developed little tricks to try to avoid unwanted questions (or surprised reactions) about my age at interviews and at work.
Sometimes I wear platform shoes to appear taller or deliberately choose clothes that make me seem more mature — for example, wearing a plainer dark shirt rather than a colorful one, even though both would be equally appropriate for a meeting.
I also find myself consciously steering conversations with work colleagues toward things people associate with adulthood. I'm more likely to mention politics or current affairs than "The Hunger Games" or "Doctor Who," even on days when I would much prefer to chat about sci-fi than the news.
Sometimes I offer to show my ID as soon as I arrive for a job interview, hoping that "proving" my age will immediately change how potential employers perceive me.
In a perfect world, though, people would be judged in the workplace for their actual skills rather than their appearance and age, real or perceived. Age doesn't automatically come with wisdom, and youthfulness isn't equal to inexperience.
I've known teenage peer-support volunteers who were fantastic at their work, and I've also encountered professionals decades older than me who were far from the best in their field.
For now, though, I'm willing to play the game when I need to. I'll wear platform shoes, put away the "childish" T-shirts, and show my ID — whatever it takes to be taken seriously as a professional adult.
Read the original article on Business Insider